Friendships

That was the theme at the Harvest Bible Chapel’s Women’s Retreat last weekend.  Amy Baker, counselor at Faith Biblical Counseling Center in Lafayette, IN, challenged us to look objectively at our friendships and discern our motives.

View from the porch of our condo at Gull Lake

She described the following Friendship Orientations. For most of us this weekend, we began to fall into either Approval or Control Oriented.

Approval Oriented                   
Control Oriented

Protection Oriented                 
Rightness Oriented

Pleasure Oriented                    
Comfort Oriented          

Prestige Oriented

I began to ask myself…

Do these things categorize me and my relationships??

More importantly, what am I willing to sacrifice in order to attain them?

Do I want to be accepted?

Do I want to be in control?

Do I want to protect myself?

Do I want to be the standard of what is right?

Do I want to be entertained?

Do I want comfort and ease?

Do I want to be part of the in-group?

I think, in part, I want all of those things… but how much of those things are simply part of us as humans?

How many times do I sacrifice transparency and genuineness so I can be accepted, in control, avoid hurt, be right, entertained, comfortable, or be in the in-group?

Do I value approval, control, protection, being right, entertainment, comfort, and being popular more than what God says about those things? 

Taking up my cross and doing radical hard things will take away my control, will make me stand out, may cause me to be hurt, will definitely make me uncomfortable, and I probably won’t have the in-group’s approval.

Am I willing to go that far?  Is Jesus worth it?

If it costs my life and the life of my family, will following Jesus be worth THAT?   
Yes. Yes! YES!!

If you are not a follower of Jesus
but you’re considering it, count the cost.

Because it WILL cost you.  Everything.  Even friendships.

Your life will never be the same because He will radically transform you.

Do not follow Christ blindly – know the cost.

His demands are high – and rightly so.  He died.  For you.

You owe Him every breath for all of eternity. Every moment belongs to Him.

For those of you who follow Jesus, LIVE like you do.

Sunrise Saturday Morning!

Every word, every action, every thought, every single moment is observed and cared about by the Sovereign God who paid your debt.  Your moments are also observed by those around you who are their own masters - who do what is right in their own eyes. 

We are to be different because we have been bought with a price.

This weekend, I was challenged by Luke 6:39-46.

What am I using my time for?

Who am I following?

Am I taking my own log out?

What kind of fruit do I have?

What kind of treasure is coming out of my mouth?

Bottom Line: Is your life, my life different?  What needs to change?

Confessions from a Children's Book Junkie

Wallace’s Lists 

by Barbara Bottner and Gerald Kruglik

“Wallace, a mouse, could do almost anything. Anything, that is, as long as he had a list.

1.    Wallace is a shy mouse.

2.   He writes lists. Lists of recipes, funny words, and frightening experiences.

3.    Wallace meets his lively neighbor Albert.

4.    His world is swiftly opened to new delights, such as painting and music.

5.    Wallace and Albert experience the excitement of an adventure, and Wallace discovers a new joy…

6.    Friendship”

The above quote comes from the inside cover of this amazing children’s book.  I found this little morsel at our local library and while reading it to my boys, almost laughed out loud!  This book accurately depicts me and my husband. I’m Wallace and He’s Albert. J

My favorite section from the book is the following:

“I changed my mind.” Albert boasted.

Wallace was dumbfounded.

“Changing my mind is an adventure,” Albert explained.

“I don’t like adventures,” said Wallace.

“An adventure can be anything. Anything that isn’t planned for.”

“You mean anything that isn’t on a list?” asked Wallace.

“Exactly!” said Albert.

“Do you ever use a map?” Wallace continued. “I have lots of maps!”

“I don’t need maps,” said Albert, “because wherever I go, there I am.”

“But what if you get lost?”

“Being lost is automatically an adventure!” cried Albert.

“Suppose you get lost and then fall down and hurt yourself?”

“I pick myself up and keep going,” replied Albert.

“When I get in an accident, it makes me feel better to write a list,” said Wallace.

I read this to Mike but could hardly read coherently we were laughing so hard!  When we were dating, Mike would come pick me up in Chicago and go wherever we had to that weekend. There was no GPS back then so he’d just ask what direction we’d need to go. I’d tell him a rough estimate “North Arlington Heights area” and along a particular road and off we’d go. Mike’s Mapless Adventures they were. It was how I came to trust his sense of direction. He was always within a couple miles of where we needed to be.

I’m Wallace. I’m sorry to admit it at times, but it is the truth. There’s nothing better than a good list! Checking off things on my list is even better. J I don’t like things not planned. It bothers me to no end to not know what is going on when I’m stressed about something coming up. I’ve intentionally structured our home to run with routines… putting dirty laundry in the sorting bins as you take off your clothes, clearing your dishes when you’re finished eating, putting your glasses in one spot so you won’t have to play Hide N Seek with them when the bus will show up in less than 5 minutes… things like that. As with anything, a great strength can be your greatest weakness. Lists ignored and routines breached can make me feel rather Autistic at times. I feel out of control and the need to cling to something familiar. I rather understand Wallace’s need to write a list when he’s had an accident – even if it’s just a list of what could’ve happened to turn perspective on its head.

If you’re reading this and you happen to know Mike and I, separately or together, you’ll immediately understand the insane humor of the quote I listed previously. Enjoy reading it again to yourself… along with the irony of two mice talking about adventure and making lists. Oh, and if you want to find out what happens to Wallace and Albert, you'll have pick up this little gem at your library! Happy Reading!!

As for me, I think this book will be my next acquisition to my children’s book library.

Maybe I’ll add it to my Book List.