Sunday, May 11, 2014

Not your typical Mother's Day post

If you clicked on this link to read a thoroughly sappy post dedicated to moms, you won't find it here - at least not thoroughly. 

If you wanted to read a diatribe on how Hallmark has capitalized on our guilt and made millions from the need to press into one day what should be readily seen every single day of your life, I'd love to, but sorry. I'm sure there is another link out there for ya. 

If you are thinking "Hmm. Well, that either makes her some neo-feminist or else a hard-hearted crazy woman", while that could be true... its not. 

I'm a mom. 

I have been such for the last nine years of my life. I have had the privilege of feeling my body change and expand uncomfortably (and dareisayit beautifully?) over the span of nine months three separate times. I've ridden the hormonal rollercoaster of the after-pregnancy and somehow made it through the fog of nighttime feedings to welcome the new normal of each new little person and how our family has changed as a result. My body bears the marks of this. I've added a few more soft spots they love to snuggle (that I wish I was more disciplined about removing). 

I'm just an average mom. 

I know a mom whose dear hubby is military and she runs a daycare. She is far more self-sufficient than I will ever be. 

Another mom is on her own making her two beautiful kids her world while going to school. 

There is another beautiful woman grieving the loss of her man and staying afloat on the grace of God while she parents her 7 amazing kids. 

I know another woman who today had her very first Mother's Day and she hasn't even met her little man yet. She wasn't sure she ever would have the chance and she's over-the-moon excited that she will meet him in a few short months. 

Another mom today thanks God for the 4 women who carried their children to term so she could wrap her arms around them and they could call her mom. 

I know another mom who gave birth to a love for orphans before she ever had one of her own. Now 4 kids later... :)

I can guarantee you each one of these amazing women feel like horrible moms some days and question their sanity on more than one occasion - sometimes daily. Having another day to throw up a "perfect-face" isn't what we moms need. We need the daily "Hey girl. No pretending or pinteresting here, how's it really going? Oh and btw, I've so got yer back! We can make it." 

Mother's Day shouldn't be a contest and secret jealousy match over whose hubby did the most and greatest. 

Being a parent sucks sometimes. It's hard. Mom or Dad: it doesn't matter. The weight of this little person/peoples life rests on both your shoulders. You screw up and lose it and feel like someone could just save you the trouble and label you a nice big failure right now because you're darn sure these kids will end up in juvenile detention by the time you're done. 

Being a parent is the single most life-shaping event that has happened to me. The woman nine years ago was still unpacking the boxes from her classroom teary eyed over the fact that she will likely not be in a classroom as a full-time teacher again. She was wading through the muck of her own emotions and coming to terms with the instant relationship her gorgeous baby girl had with her daddy knowing she couldn't rewrite the history with her own dad. Today, that woman is sitting here remembering that a blink of an eye changes life completely. Life is here and is gone. She didn't finish the dishes while her in-laws were here because relationship is more important than a clean kitchen. (And for the record - all the cooking was done yesterday :) ) She is struggling to learn the nuances of letting each child be their own person while still holding up lines and boundaries. She desperately wants to focus on what's important and most of the time, it means she isn't. 

Like I said... Today is Mother's Day. But I hope tomorrow is also your Mother's Day and also the next and the one after that. 

Because, hey girl, I know being a mom is amazing and heart-breaking all at the same time, so I got yer back. No contest here. 

The only contest is who can cheer for the other the loudest :)

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